Besos
The standard greeting in almost any country in South America requires a beso (kiss) to the cheek. Argentina is no exception. Considering I am one of the most sufficiently awkward chumans, the beso greeting took me about 8 months to tackle. I don’t think it’s just me, I think any person who is not used to kissing everyone they see on a daily basis can find this a little strange and uncomfortable. It’s also probably the main reason that Argentina is number one in swine flu deaths. That, and the sharing of maté between 15 people. There are two “greeting situations” that stick out in my mind as the most probable for awkwardness and just general weirdness to occur.
1. The group greet. It doesn’t matter if you are meeting up with two other people or twenty; you are required to give all of them a kiss upon entering the room/restaurant/situation. Finagling your way in and out of 20 people in a small sized room where some people are sitting and some are standing gets a little difficult. And don’t think that the people you are greeting are going to stand up to help you out. Nope, they usually just stay seated waiting for you to come to them. There is pretty good chance that you will step on someone’s hand or foot, or even worse, fall directly on their lap.
2. The office greet. This was by far the toughest thing for me to understand/get used to. In the US, I went straight to my cube and sat down when I got to work. If I saw someone in the hallway, I said hello or did the standard, “Can’t believe it’s only Tuesday” greeting. At my office in Buenos Aires, I pass at least 5 people on my way to what some people may consider a “desk” and must stop and give them all a kiss. There are also another 5 people that are in my sight that I have to go say “hey” to or it’s just plain rude. Accepting the fact that I have to greet them is one thing, the hardest part is that they are all sitting down and coordination is far from my middle name. This leaves room for the multiple awkward situations to occur. There is the possibility that I may lose my balance and kiss them really really hard on the cheek, possibly even letting a little saliva grace their cheek. NOT OKAY. There is also the recurring possibility that I may fall directly on their lap. Also, where do I place my hand upon leaning down? I just recently mastered the lean down, one-cheeked kiss without needing to place my hand on their shoulder. Before the mastering took place, it was a full-on balancing act that tended to get a little weird.
I have to say, the beso greeting is something I plan to take back to the states and creep all my new coworkers out with…and yes, I will be drinking maté (or rabbit food as my mother so politely refers to it) on a daily basis.
2 years ago